Afraid to Wake Up? Conquering Fear and Life

Do not fear! Daydream believers everywhere, Listen up. The time is now to wake up and live the life that we’ve been dreaming about living. So lets strap on those reality boots, focus on what we want to accomplish, and continue on the journey of our lives.

Easier said than done, I know. There are tons of factors that prevent us from achieving our goals. Bills, jobs, social obligations, family, bills, and the money in our wallets all get in the way of our dreams. The only way to get past these obstacles is to fight, tooth and nail, to rid ourselves of them. Well, sort of. We need to set ourselves up to be happy, not monetarily rich. If we do not, all of the hurdles to jump and mountains to climb will seem like impossible barriers. It is best to take each challenge one thought at a time.

Keep working hard and perhaps we will realise* the dreams are entirely in our control.

What is it that We’re afraid of?

Old Dude once said:

So, first of all, let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself—nameless, unreasoning, unjustified terror which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into advance.

While true, that sounds utterly terrifying. What the hell is fear even? Well despite the various hells being the source of all mythical fear, it turns out that it has a very real and practical existence. Fear is an excellent teacher. Karl Albrecht, Ph.D from psychology today defines fear as

An anxious feeling, caused by our anticipation of some imagined event or experience.

And Alexander Berzin, an assumed level 87 Bodhisattva, believes this about fear.

Fear is a physical and emotional uneasiness felt about something known or unknown, over which we feel we have no ability to control, handle, or bring to the result that we wish. We want to be rid of what we fear, and thus there is a strong repulsion. Even if the fear is a general anxiety, without a specific object that we fear, still there is a strong wish to be rid of an undefined “something.”

Some imagined event. Something that has not yet happened causes us to activate fight or flight responses. Anxiety is the Sauron to fear’s Morgoth. Anxiety is what traps the brain in fear. Anxiety is the labyrinth that fortifies compulsive thoughts of terror until the brain can no longer handle it. Anxiety, Anxiety, Anxiety.

Our hearts race. Our blood pumps. We rage respond according to the traditions of the body. Karl Albrecht, mentioned above, categorizes the five root fears as the fear of extinction, mutilation, loss of autonomy, separation, and ego-death. But how do we battle these Balrogs? They aren’t allowed here, that is definitely for sure. We must muster up all of our being to defeat their musty, mustard-like, fires of mustachio’d hell.

Alex Berzin, also mentioned above, goes on to explain ways of dealing with fear, before it happens.

  • Counting the cycles of breathing with eyes closed, taking as the cycle the in and out-breaths, and focusing on the sensation of the breath coming in, going down, the lower abdomen rising, then falling, and the breath going out.
  • Counting the cycles of breathing with eyes half-opened, loosely focused, looking down at the floor, taking as the cycle the out-breath, a pause, and the in-breath, with the same focus as above, and after a while, adding awareness of the sensation of our bottoms touching the chair or floor.
  • Reaffirming the motivation or goal of what we wish to achieve (becoming more calm) and why.
  • Imagining that the mind and energy come into focus like the lens of a camera.
  • Without counting the breath, focusing on the lower abdomen rising and falling while breathing and feeling that all the energies of the body are flowing harmoniously.

 

Obviously, while staring down the barrel of a gun it will be hard to practice these techniques. If we do practice these breathing exercises perhaps when we are faced with a gun point decision, we’ll be able to duck down, disarm our various demons, and continue on. We’ll be stronger because of it.

So now that we have a somewhat better understanding of how to overcome fear, lets think about what it is exactly that is keeping us from waking up. Hint: We are almost always asleep.

Dreams

There are two types of dreams. There are those that happen during the deepest sleep of the night and those that happen during the deepest sleep of the day. Sometimes the former slips into the latter, sometimes the latter slips into the former, and sometimes the ladder slips altogether and we’re stuck on the roof until Great Aunt Matilda hears our whimpering three days later.

We can use both types of dreams to achieve our goals and conquer fear.  An apparently nameless author, explains a process called treasure mapping in order to visualize our goals:

It’s a very simple but effective idea: Treasure Mapping involves creating a physical representation or collage of what you want to achieve. It acts as a constant reminder and representation of your goals. And so it intensifies the effects of visualization, which acts on your subconscious mind to motivate and encourage you towards achieving those goals.

We have all probably seen or heard of this type of thing before. Basically one imagines whatever s/he wishes to accomplish (ie. get signed to a record label, build a home, or boat across the atlantic) and then a collage is created of these ideas. The collage is then placed in a prominent space in order to remind the creator of its original intention. As time passes the collage is added to and reflected upon.

Rachael Rettner, from Livescience.com, proposes that dreams are likely to have a specific influence on the way that the brain processes information. Quoting Deirdre Barrett, a havard psychologist,

My opinion is that, evolution just isn’t wasteful, that when things evolve for one purpose, that generally they don’t continue throughout time to have only that purpose, but anything else that may be useful about them gets refined,

Evolution? HA! We all know that the earth was only created 24 years ago.**

In one experiment, Barrett had college students pick a homework problem to try to solve in a dream. The problems weren’t rocket science; they were fairly easy questions that the student simply hadn’t gotten around to solving yet. Students focused on the problem each night before they went to bed. At the end of a week, about half the students had dreamed about the problem and about a quarter had a dream that contained the answer, Barrett said.

Dreams can be used to solve problems that your brain considers important! This includes the problem of overcoming what we fear most. If every night we all go to sleep thinking “how can I make my life a better more full life” or “what is it that I wish to achieve” perhaps we’ll all happen upon some collective answer.

Waking Up 

How we balance our dreams, fears, and the reality of our position is entirely up to us. The decisions we make are seeds for the future. Just because an answer is found to be correct in terms of the original context of the problem does not mean that the question/answer is a valid one. Life is a practice that goes on and on guided by the dreams of those living it. Every night we should all hope to dream of a world in which we’ve all woken up.

We’ve all heard the story of how some great somebody or other was faced with a difficult decision, equation, and pre-paradigm shifting philosophy until, after months, and years the solution came to them in a dream. If you put enough effort into problem solving, you’re brain will do the work for you.

Notes:

*I prefer this spelling. The letter Z and I had a falling out a few years past. Long story, it wasn’t entirely my fault. This article basically says it doesn’t matter.
**Unfortunately there is no source for this information but it is most likely the only truth. I’ve been trying to find any other source so as to validate the claim that the beginning of all things began upon the instant of my birth. As far as I know, conveniently 24 years back, I can’t see there being any possibility of an earth existing before me. After I die, though, it is difficult to speculate.

 

Sources:

https://wondergressive.com/2013/01/26/our-special-time-in-the-universe/?fb_source=pubv1

http://historymatters.gmu.edu/d/5057/

http://www.berzinarchives.com/web/en/archives/sutra/level3_lojong_material/general/hand_fear.html

http://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/newCT_94.htm

http://www.livescience.com/8373-dream-real-reasons-revealed.html

http://grammarist.com/spelling/realise-realize/

You and Your Internet on Pornography

dopamine transmission pornography

Next time you are watching pornography, think of this image. http://www.ijbs.com

As our website was recently spammed with internet pornography, I feel that now is as good a time as any to let you in on a little secret: Porn behaves the same way as a drug. Perhaps you already know this. Now, I’m not here to say that drugs are bad and in extension that pornography is bad. Moushumi Ghose encourages readers to look at porn with an open and intelligent mind. I encourage you to investigate your sexuality to whatever end you please.

I will plug this though: the use of both pornography and drugs is probably best done in moderation and, in the case of pornography, it can and often will be degrading to both women and men alike. That being said, lets look at some cold hard facts.

pornography poster

It’s a look of ecstasy, not depravity. patrickmadrid.blogspot.com

The internet is full of information. All types. Ask any question and you’re likely to get an answer. If you don’t find an answer the great compass search engines will guide you along your quest. If your quest is pornography you’re in luck as the great world wide web contains so much pornography that you may die of exhaustion… enjoying it. In this article from ExtremeTech.com,  Sebastian Anthony writes:

While it obviously varies from site to site, most adult sites will probably store in the region of 50 to 200 terabytes of porn. This is quite a lot for a website (only something like Google, Facebook, Blogger, or YouTube would store more data)

That is a lot of pornography. Think about how much media you could store in just ONE terabyte. How much pornography is stored in the collective computers of everybody reading this post? 200 terabytes really isn’t all that surprising considering how long both the internet and the pornography, which predates it, have been around. With all the various pornography sites it boggles my mind thinking about the amount of information transferred to and from viewers’ computer screens.

At peak time, Xvideos might burst to 1,000Gbps (1Tbps) or more. To put this into perspective, there’s only about 15Tbps of connectivity between London and New York.

buuhwaaah?!?

…the internet only handles around half an exabyte of traffic every day, which equates to around 50Tbps — in other words, a single porn site accounts for almost 2% of the internet’s total traffic. There are dozens of porn sites on the scale of YouPorn, and hundreds that are the size of ExtremeTech or your favorite news site. It’s probably not unrealistic to say that porn makes up 30% of the total data transferred across the internet.

pornography brain scan

Pornography equates to over-stimulation of the brain.

So not only is there a lot of pornography to choose from, but it is actively being chosen and at an incredible rate. More people around the world are watching every day. Teens in high school, lawyers in offices, photographers on location, and pretty much everybody with a computer has had a visual taste of pornography. How does the viewing of a beautiful sexual act transform into a hindrance? What makes viewing pornography an addiction?

The series, which inspired this post, entitled Your Brain on Porn was put together by Gary Wilson and Marnia Robinson to explain just that. They do a wonderful job of breaking down the causes and effects of pornography as an addiction.

Here’s what’s going on with the animals: It’s called the Coolidge Effect. It starts out with declining interest in the present sexual partner. Then, renewed vigor for a novel sexual partner. This is present in all mammals, and it also occurs in females. Again, it improves genetic variety of offspring.

The Coolidge effect extrapolates to cases where lab rats have died of exhaustion because of the reintroduction of novel partners. pornography allows for the same amount of “New partners” because, as I mentioned above, there are so many video partners to choose from. It turns out that the limbic system of the brain plays a major role in the Coolidge effect.

At its most basic, our limbic system is all about “avoiding pain” and “repeating pleasure.” You see, survival depends upon the avoidance of pain—both physical and emotional. And upon the repetition of pleasure. “Hot stove bad; ice cream good; Mommy good; snake bad; porn good.” You get the idea.

So the limbic system defines our fundamental right and wrong. This is not to be confused with morality because the limbic system is instinctual and primitive where as morality is (hopefully) reasoned and rationalized.

Chemicals turn on and off certain parts of the brain. The main chemical, or neurotransmitter, that turns on the reward circuit is dopamine. The reward circuit is the engine, and dopamine is the gas.

It all comes down to…

… dopamine rising in your reward circuitry can override what’s called satiety, completeness or fullness—regardless of what your rational brain thinks about overeating, or even watching [pornography].

so therefore:

Addictions are basically chasing after dopamine. So addiction equates with wanting more, but liking it less.

So in reality we aren’t really addicting to anything but dopamine. In surreality, it is the great goose that we’ve all been chasing after. Novelty catches these geese of satisfaction but slows us down as well. The more geese we catch the faster we have to run to obtain that golden egg which makes less tasty golden omelets every time. That first omelet was delicious though, I think the next one will be better.

If you do suffer from pornography addiction or any other type of addiction please take care of yourself and seek help. The world is your clam and there are many people out there who care enough to lend you a hand.

 

Sources:

http://www.extremetech.com/extreme/124561-ibm-to-build-exascale-supercomputer-for-the-worlds-largest-million-antennae-telescope

How Big are Pornography Sites

The Good and Bad

Your Brain on Pornography