If someone held a gun to my head and screamed, “Quick! Pick the dumbest animated TV character of all time RIGHT NOW!” I’d probably panic (and cry) but ultimately go with Patrick from Spongebob Squarepants. I’d like to think a portion of you readers would agree with me—maybe pat me on the back and console me, y’know? Thanks, readers. It’s good to know you have my back.

I don’t watch the show, so I could be wrong…but I seem to always walk in on someone watching it at the exact moment Patrick is saying something ridiculously stupid. This seems to be expected. On one occasion, however, he and Spongebob had an argument (or domestic dispute—they’re dating or something, right?) and stormed off to their separate residences. That’s when I realized: Patrick lives in a dome home!

From a scientific perspective, dome homes make so much sense it’s a wonder we haven’t all evolved into bubble-based communities like the 90’s had envisioned*. They can withstand most, if not all, natural disasters, are highly energy efficient, and they also require less maintenance with less building materials.

The single biggest reason for living in a dome home is its great super power: it can withstand just about any natural disaster. I really can’t explain this better than with this quote from Valerie Sigler, a dome home resident (emphasis mine):

As we were building the dome, Tropical Storm Isadore came ashore and left a mess, but no damage. Then, in 2004, Hurricane Ivan slammed into Pensacola Beach wreaking enough havoc that it was called Ivan, The Terrible. Although many of my neighbors’ houses were piles of rubble or completely washed away, the dome suffered no structural damage. The Dome’s front staircase was designed to break away (which it did) to avoid damage to the actual structure. The 2005 hurricane season brought several storms to our shore: Tropical Storm Arlene in June; Hurricane Dennis in July; and Katrina in August. Hurricane Dennis was an extremely damaging storm to Pensacola Beach. Much to the community’s dismay, many of the repaired homes and buildings that made it through Ivan were decimated by Dennis. Again, the Dome of a Home suffered no structural damage.

For those keeping track, that was a shit ton of storms that hit Sigler’s area! Holy shit, is there any reason her neighbors didn’t uproot everything and go dome immediately after the Sigler’s house gave Isadore the middle finger?!

From Dome of a Home, we get this little gem:

Since there is no roof to lift off and no straight walls for the tornado to build pressure against, domes are virtually tornado proof.

As if that wasn’t enough, since there is no shingling and your roof isn’t being blown away by tornadoes and the like, dome homes are essentially maintenance-free. Dome homes can be made of various materials. Treehugger.com has noted that with the polyurethane dome kits (they come in pieces to be assembled and can be built in 7 days by 3 or 4 people)

Construction of the Dome House does not produce any waste, nor does it involve any deforestation.

Generally speaking, in non-tropical/beach areas, dome homes are about comparable in price to traditional homes. However, the savings over time are substantial. Things like energy costs, for example:

Geodesic domes use up to 50% less energy than a traditionally built home. Since surface area is minimized compared to the interior volume, these structures hold in plenty of heat as long as their walls are thick and well-insulated. In warm weather, the chimney effect is created, and hot air is drawn up and out of the structure as long as it’s properly ventilated.

Just for a little perspective:

In Alaska, the 8000 square foot Trinity Christian Center has an average heating bill of $72.

So maybe the real idiots are all of us schmucks who don’t live in half-circle structures. Or possibly the sponge who lives underwater in a freaking pineapple!

 

*To be fair, is there anything the 90’s envisioned that the 2000’s didn’t severely under-deliver on?

 

Sources
Wikipedia: Patrick Star
Advantages of Domes
Living Small, Cheap and Simple. Try a Dome House
Geodesic Dome Homes